Encountering the Dragon

We recently watched the final episode of Peter Jackson's The Hobbit. Bilbo Baggins, the titular hobbit, is at his finest in this episode. Hearkening back to the first installment of the series, you remember that Bilbo started out the journey not wanting to leave his comfortable home. It wasn't even his request for which he was being recruited by Gandalf and the dwarves. He went, though, more in response of being spurned by the dwarves than by being motivated by the quest itself.

You'll recall the group of dwarves and Gandalf were enjoying a fine meal at Bilbo's expense. The dwarves informed Bilbo that they were seeking someone to share an adventure but were having no luck. Bilbo responded, ""I should think so — in these parts! We are plain quiet folk and have no use for adventures. Nasty disturbing uncomfortable things! Make you late for dinner!"

Not only was Bilbo not interested in the adventure he couldn't bother with one because he might be late for dinner. You probably laugh at the thought of passing up an adventure because it might make you late for dinner. Yet, how often do we do just that: stay in the comfort of our homes instead of going out on unknown adventures. In book form, it makes a great story with a little bit of humor. In reality, though, we often don't think it's such a funny thing.

Back at the dinner party, tales of great adventure are being shared with gusto by Bilbo's guests. Bilbo's heart sank. The hobbit in him simply wasn't interested. Yet, there was another part of him--the Took blood that ran in his body--that was intrigued. It just needed a little flame to be brought to life.

That spark came in the form of being seen as less than he saw himself as being. Having collapsed while the stories were being regaled, he overheard one of the dwarves saying that he "looked more like a grocer" than a thief. The Took blood within him was brought to life enough for him to decide to go on the adventure.

He went to bed with that but woke the next morning ready to tell the others that he, in fact, wasn't going to go. Only he was alone in his comfortable home and had nobody to tell. When Gandalf appeared shortly thereafter, Bilbo had enough spunk to hurry after the departing party.

How often do you find yourself embarking upon an unexpected adventure? I know a couple years ago when I received my pink slip at work I found myself on an unexpected adventure. Welcome or not, it was enough to cause concern.

Bilbo now on the adventure found himself hiding in the face of danger more often than not. Somewhere along the trip, though, he built up some semblance of courage. Gollum's ring which enabled him to be invisible helped, of course.

Although we might not have Gollum's ring, we may find ourselves being overlooked and invisible. Who are we to take on giants and orcs? Yet, I have found, being overlooked can turn out to be an advantage. After all, if nobody expects us to attack, they'll be surprised when we do.

Attacking from the shadows was a lesson Bilbo learned and put to use when entering the cave he feared—Smaug's lair. Instead of facing Smaug directly with sword in hand, Bilbo entered quietly, invisibly in order to seek the treasure of the Arkenstone.

It was Bilbo who achieved the mission of gaining the treasure, the stone that would reestablish Thorin, the leader of the dwarves in the party, as king under the Mountain. Ultimately, Thorin's greed got the best of him.

Fortunately, for all those who faced the evil horde of enemies in the Battle of the Five Armies, Bilbo retained his unassuming nature even after having gained the Arkenstone.

Throughout the adventure, Bilbo retained his sense of self. His perspective grew as he developed through the journey, but he never saw himself as more than he was. He was sufficient for the task, but not greater than any of his companions.

Your journey will likely cause you to expand beyond your limited perspective. The trick will be to believe in that potential while retaining the humility to look at your companions as equals. Happy adventures, you are up to the task!

The Widow's Mite

A painting hangs in the office buildings of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints in Salt Lake City. The painting is that of a young widow surrounded by children. The woman is casting in two mites. The Savior is in the background with a handful of his disciples. He tells them that of her want the widow has cast in all she has. 

There have been others with greater wealth who have cast in aplenty. But she has given all she has.

There are times when I have plenty, and I am able to give more. I have more energy, so I am able to provide greater service. I have more optimism, so I can give more encouragement. 


There are other times, though, when I don't have as much. I am in my down cycle of dealing with depression. I don't have the energy that I do at other times, so it is much more difficult to serve. I am filled with more pessimism than optimism. I struggle to give myself encouragement let alone anyone else. 

Deep within, I still have the same desire to serve. I simply don't have the same resources. My reservoir has been depleted to some degree. Sometimes more significantly than others. 

Yet, I am the same person in both circumstances. It is almost like I have two sides of me that are distant relatives. They know each other and may even recognize each other in passing, but they aren't close. 

When I am in my depressive state, I doubt that I will ever get better. On the other hand, when I am in my more stable state (maybe even a little better than stable), I thrill a little at the idea that I have gotten past the depression. I think that I am done with it and won't be heading back to see that sad little cousin. 

Both cousins have the same internal motivation to serve and to celebrate the differences in people and in life. 

Yet, they don't have the same resources. 

Carrie Fisher, in her book Wishful Drinking, refers to her two cousins as Pam and Roy. Roy is full of energy and enjoys life to excess. Pam, on the other hand, struggles to plod ahead. 

I don't know the names of my two distant cousins, yet. I do recognize that they are related and do have a similar motivation to serve and give of themselves. They just don't have the same capacity to do so.

Both have insights and service to give. I am beginning to appreciate that fact. 

Another thought on the matter is that the dichotomy that exists within me also exists in the people I find around me in daily living. I aspire to what Carol Dweck refers to as a growth mindset. At times when I am more of my "normal" self, I am much more in the growth mindset. 

In those periods, I am amazed that not everybody is in that same mindset. Don't they see life as an opportunity to learn and grow. To become better than they have been. To experience life as a living, breathing creature full of possibility. 

I am seeing, though, as I look at myself. That we don't all have the same capacity all the time. Some of us are struggling to survive. Life isn't a magical creature we are trying to tame. It can be either a threatening beast we cower before, or it is an old horse neglected in the stable.

I am learning compassion for those striving to hold on. I do aspire to live with a growth mindset. But sometimes it does't work out that way.